• Tokengraph
  • Posts
  • 🍿 ‘Crypto King’ isn’t Crypto’s Fault + FOMC memes

🍿 ‘Crypto King’ isn’t Crypto’s Fault + FOMC memes

Reading time 3m22s

Gm 😎

Today's Agenda:

  • FOMC Day 📊

  • Crypto King ⚖️

  • MSTR Buys Dip 💰

  • Colorado + BTC 🔥

  • $#17! $160M Hack 🤭

It’s FOMC day but we’ll keep it short and sweet

Basically I just wanna share this:

It’d be funny if it weren’t so pathetic.

  • Batman Beyond

The Fed has only hiked by 100bps 7 times since WWII 👀

They all occurred between 1978 and 1980, meaning it’s been 40 years since things have really gotten this bad, at least in terms of the Fed’s reaction.

One thing that has surely never happened before though..

75bps = bullish 🤡

As we said on Monday, that weekend dip was likely the markets pricing in 75bps, so if that’s all we get then they should be happy.

100bps = pain 🤕

I think this is all a waste of energy.

Just use BTC 😄

And stop trying to call the bottom!

We’ll be back tomorrow in any case to bask in the aftermath 😎

We need to talk about this.

First of all.. look at the kid.

I feel like this is what 39-year-old infl00encer Bitboy Crypto (Ben Armstrong) should look like 👀

Maybe they should swap names.

Anyway, now realize that people gave our young crypto genius here millions of dollars to invest in crypto, some with the expectation of “10-20% bi-weekly returns”.

His company allegedly owes $35M to around 140 investors.

Somehow this is crypto’s fault 🙄

Ponzi, thief, grifter, scammer.. these terms are being very casually associated with crypto, and it’s true that crypto presents unique and novel opportunities for scumbags to steal money.

There’s a learning curve involved.

Start here:

Also, never share your keys.

And don’t sign shady contracts.

That’s pretty much it.

Crypto King’s lawyer stated in an email to CBC Toronto that his client “started investing in cryptocurrency as a teenager and people gave him money to invest once they saw how much money he was making for himself and people around him — but he never solicited money.”

Fine, say that’s true.

It should still be illegal to take money on the promise of 10-20% bi-weekly returns 😒

He says basically that he lost all the money given to him in 2021-22 on margin calls and bad trades - I wouldn’t be surprised if he has a LUNA tattoo 😅

The best line in the article though has to be:

"He was taking in a lot of money in cash, and well, how do you keep track of cash?"

How indeed 🧐

How do you keep track of cash?

Tap your answer below to see if you’re right!

Web3 Pipeline 📢

Saylor bought the dip again - MicroStrategy bought 301 BTC between Aug 2 and Sept 19 for about $6M, according to a filing with the SEC yesterday. The alpha chad’s company now has nearly 130k BTC that they paid a total of $3.98B for. Their average cost is $30,639 per BTC. They’re either geniuses or the joke of the decade.

COLORADO BECOMES FIRST US STATE TO ACCEPT BTC AS PAYMENT FOR TAXES - ah yes, now the taxman can rob Coloradans in a cool new decentralized way. Sounds awesome, until you realize they only allow citizens to make their BTC payments through PayPal, which isn’t exactly the paragon of decentralized crypto wallets. Still one step toward adoption though, and Colorado has been a trendsetter in the past being one of the first states to legalize marijuana for recreational use.

“Profanity” cause of $160M hack - this could have been a lead story if it was really about bad words, but I saved you a bunch of corny jokes. Profanity is the name of a service which generates “vanity addresses” for digital cryptocurrency accounts to make them easier to work with, and it was just last week when the 1inch network blog posted about a potential security risk. Wintermute, a London-based crypto firm that trades $billions worth of digital assets daily, lost $160 million in a hack yesterday.

NFT drops of the day 👀

Wakus ⚔️ | 1.4 (SOL)Sept 21 - 6,666 galactic warriors belonging to one of 11 elements and battling for glory and crypto rewards in the Wakuland metaverse and PvP game coming soon

Helions ☀️ | 3 (SOL)Sept 22 - 10,000 female & male Solar Sentinels brought to you by web3 payments platform Helio

RadCats 🐱 | 2.5 (SOL)Sept 23 - 4 brands under one rad roof: RadRacing, CodeRad, RadWear and RadExperience

🛑 NOTE: drops not promoted/endorsed✅ DYOR and practice safe minting!

If you’re feeling the bear market blues, you can always exit game like this lad who set up a garage sale for his nifties 🤣

We truly appreciate the dedication.

That’s all for today frens!

How was today's newsletter? Help us get better:

Thanks for voting! We can only improve with feedback from little geniuses like you.

Today’s Tokengraph is brought to you by Binance Card

Binance is the largest cryptocurrency exchange in the world by trading volume.

The Binance Card offers cashback rewards in their native exchange token, BNB.

Why wait?

DISCLAIMER: This is not financial advice. This newsletter is strictly educational and is not investment advice to buy or sell any assets or to make any financial decisions. Do your own research.